Yay- new poetry!

Pillow Sham

As we lay,
we're lying to ourselves
Though your arms surround me,
you don't have a hold on me.

I put my palm around and feel your pulse
but I still haven't gotten to your heart.
And even touching face to face,
we're not hitting our situation head-on.

Entwined in a lie,
we rest unsettled
on a pillow
once comfy-
but since worn out and come apart
at the seams.

Now wide-eyed
I sit up and wonder
Shall we both come off this pillow sham for good?

--------------

There, There America

America, I know,
you're not yourself lately
The disease is spreading
I don't blame you
seems
like everyone else is
making you ill-
achy, cranky, fidgety, lightheaded, unstable...

Don't worry
you'll get better
you always do.
-----------------
An American Defense

America, I'm sick of it too
My estranged, caustic bros and sisses
dissing, pissing on you-
slaying your good character with verbal disdain
saying your name constantly in vain
dishing out daggers directly toward you
bashing your history
trashing your glory
and even giving you grief over your
girth and great influence

My dearly misguided bros and sisses
wish for your destruction

All the while
they rack up in your riches
profit from your charity
suck you up and crush you
like a lollipop
ans sully up the public pool of freedom you've built
Shameful. Just shameful.

Summarizing...

events from this year in hopes of completing another end of the year "piece" relating noteworthy happenings and emotions in my own life with several milestones throughout the U.S and world.

Some topics/themes/thoughts/emotions swimming in my mind on this new piece:

Trial/tribulations, on-going frustrations (in the country, in love, etc)
on my turning 30
death/finality, and life after
Deal, or no Deal (not the game show but judging events being a major concern or not)
living in historical times (on the wave of changes socially and politically)


Names/phenomena quite possibly to be mentioned (definitely in no order of importance): Twitter, Guiding Light, Bernard Madoff, tea party, Michael Jackson (duh!), Bea Arthur, Natasha Richardson, The Stimuls Jay Leno, Glenn Beck, Colbie Caillat, Ft Hood incident, Ed McMahon, Brett Favre, the media, Farrah Fawcett, Windows 7, Jon and Kate (yeah... hate to but...), Kanye West (yeah...ditto), Cash 4 Clunkers, Elvis Presley, Pittsburgh Steelers, Ballon Boy (or lack there of one), Patrick Swayze, Brooks and Dunn, Tre (baby nephew born in 09), The Beatles, Barack Obama, cap and trade, Taylor Swift, Steve McNair, North Korea, Iran elections, David Letterman, Los Angeles Lakers, New York Yankee/ A-Rod, bailouts/AIG...

Lots of material here from which to keep pondering.

my latest happenings, thoughts...

--just finished doing the Film, Stage and Showbiz Expo... payed the price standing all day as directory signup girl with sore feet but worth it, made some cool contacts, got $50 for a "volunteer position- sweet!

-- being having major issues with the dinosaur Insignia computer. It's on life support, kinda adrift like a black box in the sea!

-- working as a calendar girl on the side...not so sexy as one would think

-- writing real letters with pal in Florida. Oh the art of letterwriting shall not be totally lots

--anxious to get a LOT of new music. Anyone, feel free to send me song files! I'm loving the Lady A song- Need You Now. Who hasn't been so desperately wanting someone in the darkest hour!

More to come soon!

Music you should check out...

REVIEW

Here's one music nugget in my collection you should have if you're open to eccletic style like me :-) More to come as I write.


For Starters: Rhen's Always on My Mind

When hungry for a little this and that, go for the musical tapas of Rhen's debut, Always on my Mind. The native New Yorker offers up noshes of sensible pop-pers, tinged with a groovy soft rock for the ears. If open to embrace variety, one will enjoy the humble yet delectable dishes from the emerging musician-songwriter.

There is a decidedly Latin flavor to the meal of AOMM. Rhen gladly embraces his Argentine roots, revealing to be typical romantico in tender tracks, as in the standout "Si Me Encuentras" which has a whimsical infusion of violin. Yet, he evolves from this persona, showing affection without sounding too affected, as if he were an Iglesias. AOMM presents 7 tracks in Spanish. For the espanol illiterate, there can be consolation in that 2 of them are translated into English compliments. So, you have your exotic chorizos aside plain sausage links.

A hit with early Rhen connoisseurs, the title track, is an enjoyable empanada with a tinge of flavor that Sting would serve up. But, perhaps the most palatable dish of AOMM, the paella if you will, is "How Long", highly favored for its groovy guitar infection that gets one movin'. One who delights in the discerning taste of the Dave Matthews Band would likely appreciate the influence on this offering.

Just as any tapas dish would have, AOMM has a scrumptious simplicity and old world quality. Rhen's first signature offerings are based from a mix of common ingredients blended to pure pleasure: not too fussy chords and sincere lyrics expressing sincerity on love and life soul-searching. With strong skills of musicianship, Rhen puts out his heart and soul. Proof is in all the gratifying morsels.

Check out the lovely Rhen (now known as Adrian Edward) online: http://www.adrianedwardblog.com

Feeling...

... slightly, just slightly optimistic in career hunting
... it's time for the fall season to commence
... sad over Guiding Light ending
... frustration over technology overload and breakdown
... Minnesota (Desperation: Feeling Minnesota, a poem)

No warmth of his love
but it's fine... a cold shoulder
is still a shoulder



... to write letters again
... to change wardrobe considerably
... not the Black Eyed Peas' I Got A Feeling

Hope

Last night this one came to me within about 10 minutes. I did some minor changes with the last few verses. This one is a bit autobiographical, though about everyone can relate to that low feeling that sneaks up from time to time. The title of this is one I wanted to use for a poem and sure enough, here it is...

There's Hope for Me Yet



Depressed? I guess
At least I haven't
pumped a bullet in my chest
But I am desperately looking for a dress
even though many are jammed pressed
on the pole... damnit
can't find one that fits!

Am I stressed?
Sure, I haven't made the best
of this life
but no strife.
See the knife?
It's cutting a grilled cheese sandwich
not through my stomach.

Am I hard pressed?
Perhaps... I can attest
life trials are similar to
the iron grooves of the panini press.
I'm tough sourdough
taking the heat but get flattened
in the end.

Deflated?
Well, yes...
Nevertheless,
I am not defeated
Though not yet completed
I'm not a hopeless
utter mess.

This one is #43...

on my 2009 Poem List- Rock Show Wristband




You gave me a sweet moment
allowing me amazing access
to spectacular excess,
great space to roam,
and special attention.

But I was not stuck on you.
No, you were more so on me.
You got so ragged.
So, I eventually had to cut you off.
You were worth nothing in the end.

A Blizzard of thoughts....

I love, LOVE my Luna guitar. Plays just right. Good for a newbie like me.



MY NEWS UPDATE: I'm going to work the Blizzard gaming event this weekend in Anaheim. Don't know if I'll get any perks but many guys (and girls) would kill to get in through the doors. Ozzy Osbourne's performing as well. Creepy creatures abound, RPG nerds galore...oh my!
http://www.blizzard.com/us




MUSING: Terrorist from Lockerbie bombing is getting freed while people are going crazy over Michelle Obama wearing shorts on vacation? Are you kidding me? Oh, the sad, sad state of news today!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_Am_Flight_103


POETRY: From margin scratch writing, I've created 3 poems:

1. Halle Berry


There is no "me" in Halle Berry-
just "he"
He wants me to be
just like her
I don't bother to try-
On to another guy



2. Supposedly

Supposedly, I have perfect breasts
not too big, not too small
completely "cuppable"
Capable of driving a man whild in motion

Well, he should give my mind a test
and consider me all
That is, if he's willing and able
to even grasp that motion.


3. Cougar Class


I need to school him in
teach him the basics
If I have to
Claw the chalkboard
to get his attention
I will
Oh Will
my sweet Willie,
I can't wait until
you turn 18

3 days of 30...

and nothing's changed! I don't feel old, not making big deal over some winkles magnified a hundred times in my mind. By God's graces and great genes, I still look fairly young. Overall, I'm feeling that the thirties will be a time in which I finally figure out myself and setlled down with a greater Leo confidence I know I can show, if not 100%, maybe 93%.

What I ate on my birthday:
1 Egg scrambled w/cheddar cheese(if not 1 whole a little less) , 2 slices of bacon and a small dump of grits (OMG- hadn't had in a while)

Dinner at Frida Restaurant: Resplandor de Mango (yummy baby greens salad with diced mango, goat cheese), one cheese goridta (size of a meatball) and a glass of Riesling. Also about 3/4 of a slice of tres leches cake.

Poetically, I have not summed up this occasion of turning 30. I suspect that I will a bit later. It's like as I do with my poetic end of the year summaries of the past few years- finalize my thoughts about 3 or 5 weeks later in an epic-long poem.

Some random thoughts...

This was originally was written on Aug 1. I'm flirting on modifying this but we shall see..

There's Something About (tenative title)

there's something about
a doggie when he turns
his head to the side

it gets to me every time

and when I see a Lucy rerun
every now and then,
like the grape stomping episode.

I giggle each time

and when I look at
a passing baby bouncing on by
with googly eyes

I get goofy...

and forget about
all the bad stuff in this world

OMG Guess who's turning 30

Beginning of August 2009... this month marks a major mile stone, 30. Wow! I'm not quitely feeling it, certaainly don't look it (everyone says this, so it MUST be true).....does this means that 30 won't happen then? Hehe... No anxiety over 30 really. Save the black balloons- or bring them on!

Today... another beautiful one in southern California. I walked around Old Towne Orange, went to a church rummage sale (got cute black pumps w/out crazy heels), walked around to a few more sales at houses and picked up a long black blazer and a Rolling Stones guitar pick necklace. Then, I went to the ridulously awesome $1 bookstore and spent about $30 mostly on poetry related books (just had to get Cliff Notes for The Divine Comedy to go along with everyone else) OK, it will take forever to get through all that I have bought but it was all worth a great deal! Someone must remove me from a book sale for the next 2 months.

I played the guitar for a hour or so. Doing the self-teach is not bad so far but I do think to make a bond with a player so, besides YouTubing and searching some random dudes gracious enough to give advice with free audio lessons. I've got C major down! Soon, all the basic chords will feel comfortable for me.

I'm gonna rock the evening out with music in my ears while try to get in a poetic mood. Gotta get inspired!

Some recent writing

Thoughts & Observations at the Food Court-- began to write this at a food court in Irvine. I wasn't hungry for actual food then but for poetic words and within a few hours came these...


I'm feeling pizza
and jealous that Shaggy looking dude
sitting left from me
can scarf down three slices
without even thinking of the consequences

and I'm also feeling pasta
and sympathetic for that young girl
sitting right from me
struggling to feed her baby
with not a flinch of help from the baby daddy

I'm kinda craving too Chinese
and wondering if
all the food court furniture
and plastic silverware
is made in China

or more so I'm feeling ice cream
and the chill of the couple
across from me
who's silence is louder
than the boy screaming for a scoop cone

I'm feeling also Mexican
and whether it's right that
all the food court clean-up crew
is indeed-
Mexican

I need something healthy
but realize that nothing
can be deemed truly healthy
at a food court-
I mean, nothing

I'm really feeling something fried
and absolutely angered
that folks waste food
and don't put their trash
in the waste bins

Or maybe, I'm feeling Japanese
but I'll be too lonely
eating steak and sushi
with chopsticks
all by myself

Hmmm... but I settle on good ol' American
Yeah, a little this and that all on one plate...
I just hate it when folks just stick
to one ethnic cuisine
all the damn time!

27 July 2009
9:22 PM


I Told You So-- inspired by my beloved Richard who passed away last year. His demise is a hard swallow at times. I feel these words raw just as the feeling held right after hearing about his death...


Not one for always winning the argument
I really wish I did with Richard
He said and reinterrated,
time and again
he would die young.
Each time, I countered
with a passion,
in compassion

Well, one November day he went
To say his demise hit hard
is undeniable, but, equally, I hated
I didn't win
that damn argument- I was wrong
long after being interred
I hear him say, "I told you so
but I love you though".

15 July 2009
11:05 AM

"Mommy"-- I was writing this one for at least a year. If I were actually a mother, I think this one would have come much faster ...

There is no "me" in mommy
though it sounds so
Much of everything gets lost-
sweet virginity;
idle time,
a waistline...

But all of these, I do not carp
'cause when you have a child
what's seemingly lost,
streams
eventually
into sweet oblivion ...

22 July 2009
10:33 PM

Initial words...

Writing from the Margins features a mix of my poetry (often scribbled on margins of note paper) and miscellany musings that may be conjured up to fill this space. Be amused, be inspired, be in the know 'bout little ol' me.